Hello and Happy Monday,
It feels like summer! I love it!! This weekend we celebrated Melissa’s 8thBirthday! I cannot believe it. When my parents would say that my siblings and I are growing up too fast it was annoying, but I totally understand it now.
We are still focusing on Tapas this month; not tapa, the small plated Spanish appetizer, but discipline. But since I brought up food, I made a cake for Melissa’s birthday. I started making a special cake for my kids when Michael turned 3. I made him a dinosaur cake and used fondant for the first time. Each birthday I have made them the cake that they have requested and it’s been special, Spiderman, Superman, Robin (from Batman), Cinderella's carriage, Avengers, Lego Ninjago, Minecraft, Little Mermaid, so many different kinds of cake. The cakes take a while and sometimes I think of instead of spending all the time making and decorating the cake, if I should instead, be spending time with them. We’ve been through a lot of changes in the last few years and this birthday I thought, maybe I could switch it up and not make a special cake anymore. I’ve been leaning into myself lately and trying to figure out what I need, my answer has been more rest. So the thought of not doing the cake had me feeling relieved with one thing “off my plate”. However, after lunch with a friend last week, we got to talking about our challenges as parents and how being consistent is so important. She reminded me how the cakes were part of that consistency. That it’s not just part of a tradition that I am creating, but in the scheme of life, the few hours on the cake is nothing compared to the memory I am helping create. So I made a cake! And because I had changed my mindset to have this cake be about keeping consistency, I didn’t get frustrated when I made it. I get frustrated because I am not a baker, and because I only make two of these kinds of cake a year so it's not something I am working on improving or even maintaining. Also maybe I was more at ease because Michael is getting older and he helped a lot more than in previous years with Melissa’s cake.
This is Tapas! The consistency of showing up for something. It’s not just showing up for your mat, or writing a lunch note every school day, or making a birthday cake, or hand making a Halloween custom, or whatever tradition you have, it’s also HOW you show up. My mindset, my attitude, was about keeping the tradition, being consistent for my children, and in turn, making that cake was light and easy. Showing up is important, it’s about creating that consistency, but how you show up also matters. And showing up in a bad mood, angry, annoyed, whatever you are feeling is also ok. It’s all ok – it’s about paying attention.
Do you know what you are consistent with? Do you have something for every day, every week, every Tuesday, every month, every year, or every anniversary date? How do you show up?
I’d love to know what special things you do for yourself and your family or important people in your life.
Keep showing up!